Binary is Boring

In the last decade, we have begun to see more inclusive terms for gender identity and gender expression. The amount of information out there is always changing and expanding, so it may feel a bit overwhelming when trying to understand terminology that does not ascribe to the heteronormative binary that you may have grown up with. Don’t worry! It’s never too late to broaden and change that binary mindset. 

First and foremost, I cannot express how important it is to always ask for pronouns! Never assume anyone’s identity! Nothing makes anyone feel less than, quite like assuming who they are, rather than asking them who they are. I mean, I hate it when someone misspells my name with a PH rather than an F (steFanie), imagine having a stranger tell you who you are as a person? Yeah, it’s very dehumanizing. Gender neutral pronouns are They/them, Zie/Zir, or Zieself/Emself. Gender neutral pronouns help to avoid assumptions about someone’s gender expression and identity; and are often accepted pronouns for nonbinary identifying individuals. 

Gender identity and gender expression tend to get lumped in together, however there are differences here with expression being the operative word. Gender identity, refers to the individual's inner sense of self that can be more feminine, masculine, or in between. Whereas gender expression encompasses a multitude of expressed behaviors, physical attributes such as clothing or hairstyle, and how you interact with the world around you based on ‘gendered’ norms crafted by society, and our nuclear family. When talking about gender identity and gender expression, we cannot forget about the power of Trans. Transgender is an umbrella term for individuals whose gender identity and/or expression is different from cultural expectations based on the sex they were assigned at birth. For example, someone born with a penis, may idenify as nonbinary, and express themselves with both masculine and feminine energy/aethetics. 

Gender expansive terms such as gender-queer, A-gender, gender-fluid, pangender, and intergender are relatively newer, but more wildly used gender identity and genger expression terminology. Gender-queer encompases identities that fall between or outside of masucline/feminine, where as A-gender is a gender neutral identity for those who have no connection to either male/female expression. Gender-fluid is an identifier that allows for fluidity, meaning expression  and identity varies over time, whereas pangender encompasses any and all gender identity, and expression. Intergender, is a term used to identify those whose identity is between genders and/or a combination of gender identities and expressions.

Gender identity and gender expression are just the tip of the information iceberg when beginning to utilize more inclusive language. While in conversation asking for pronouns, and having open discussions about gender norms and their expressions, shows support for those who don’t follow society’s tragic binary, which let’s face it, who wants to live in a black and white world? It’s all about color, baby! But, we are far from being inclusive as a whole. Doctors offices still ascribe to the binary view, male/female, boy/girl, and often invalidate those who identify outside the realm of it. Next time you’re at the dentist, or the doctor, perhaps put on your ally hat, and ask them why aren’t they updating their documentation, and GET WITH IT.